Sunday, August 07, 2011

Best Friend

I've never really had a best friend in my adult life. I grew up having best friends though. My very first bestie was Valerie Mason. We went to 4 year old, half day, pre-k together at a Lutheran Church. Her Grandpa owned a Dairy Mart right down the road from the church and we would walk down there and he would give us a popsicle. Think about that. FOUR YEARS OLD walking a few blocks by ourselves. I would never trust Simon to make it six houses down, much less a few blocks away. Anyway, we were best friends through about second or third grade until she moved I think. She was also my first kiss and my first shared cigarette. See what kind of a life I lived? I am Facebook friends with Valerie and I asked her if she remembered our kissing and smoking adventures. She did. I guess I'm a good kisser. Then, bestie number two was Deanne Davidson. She lived down the street from me in grade school. She loved horses and had three older sisters and one older brother. We skipped school once in the fourth grade and skateboarded all around town. Deanne died of anorexia in her adult life. Then I moved and changed schools in the 6th grade. My sixth grade bestie was Julie Edwards. Always more mature than I was, but we hung out a lot that year. Julie took my little brother's virginity when he was 12 and she was 14. Julie ended up getting pregnant at 16 and now lives a life with no phone married to a guy named Stoner. Or maybe Stoney. When we moved into 7th grade, Tammy Fletcher became my best friend and stayed my bestie until about 10th grade when I got my first real boyfriend. Tammy and I walked everywhere together. To the mall, the Dairy Queen, Bob's Burgers, you name it, we walked there. I was the better student, she was the better communicator. I remember her birthday, meeting half way between our houses, laying on the ground and watching the clouds. She currently lives in Bend, OR selling real estate. Before the market went under, she was doing quite well and still makes more money than we do even in this market. She was born to sell. Greg Suiter was my first real boyfriend. He was a runner and his dad was an asshole. He was an only child and he could never meet his father's expectations. We dated about two years until I moved away to Washington right before my senior year. Greg eventually got married, then divorced, then got his girlfriend pregnant, then killed himself in the garage of his house. I sent flowers to the funeral and have sent a Christmas card to his mama ever since. His mama did divorce his dad prior to Greg's death but after he graduated from high school. Greg's son never got a chance to meet him, but at least Greg's mom has something to remind her of her only child. My senior year I was the new girl in a very small high school. I found another boyfriend and clung to him and his family like crazy. I still keep in touch with his parents although I haven't talked to him since he broke up with me in the summer of 1985.

I got married in 1988 and haven't had a best (girl)friend since. Sometimes I miss that. I realize having a best friend requires work and I am just not the kind of person that likes to nurture a relationship. I despise talking on the phone, I don't have a lot of time to do things with a friend, and I don't really like other people's children. I would, however, like to go out once in awhile and have a margarita and talk about things besides kids and husbands. Does anyone want a best girlfriend? I'm available.


Madame Rubies said...

I can relate so well to this post. I had mostly male friends until I got married. Then, I had no friends outside of the Internet until our time in Brandon. I do have a a "BFF" now, and she is an answer to prayer.

SUPAHMAMA! said...

Are we copycatting my prompts, missy? Great post, and while I'd offer to be a bestie, I'm pretty sure you're not a fan of people who are too hydrated for their own good. :)